the finer dandy

Why do I feel like vomiting? This lay-off scare is too familiar. It’s like having a monthly case of chronic diarrhea. You know it’s coming so you wait for it, anticipate it, let it pass through and then move on.

But whenever I feel down, I think about my BART ride back to the East Bay from Pride on Sunday afternoon. Whilst I was reading my copy of “Tweak” by Nic Sheff, the car was packed with people. I was kind of annoyed with all the noise, but then I was delighted to hear a group of girls reenact this key scene of “Dreamgirls”:

Okay, they didn’t reenact the whole thing, but they were wildin’ out singing “Heavy Heavy” and it brought a smile to my face because I am obsessed with this diva scene. I find odd hilarity when Effie (Jennifer Hudson) gets all fussy and then storms out of the room after her bellowing voice of authority drowns out Deena’s (Beyonce). It’s so SASSY! And as we all know, SASS pushes all the GRUMPIES away!

So a couple of weeks ago, I met the soft-spoken soccer (also known in the international world as “football”) Brit at the unveiling of his new Emporio Armani underwear ad in Union Square in San Francisco.

He didn’t say much when he was on stage. Honestly, I think he didn’t need to because swarms of hot and bothered women and men were drooling over him. He was kind of late to the event and I got there really early because they told me to. It was hot. Okay - it was SF’s definition of hot.

After he signed a bunch of autographs for the select group of people who bought $200 worth of EA underwear, I waited backstage with another reporter from People magazine. We were the “chosen two” who had the opportunity to speak with the coveted David Beckham. I felt special.

I wanted to get a picture with him to add to my arsenal of “Celeb & Me” photos and it didn’t seem like his “handlers” were allowing it - so I devised a sneaky plan. I asked our photographer to take a picture of me while I had my recorder stuck in his face. It wouldn’t be a “formal” pic, but it would be one of me and him in the same frame and that was good enough for me.

We were waiting outside this ghetto tent in Union Square for him to finish an interview with this gal from Extra and as soon as he came out, photographers, including ours, started snapping pics and some uptight dude was all “NO PICTURES!”

BUSTED! My plan failed before it even took off.

Anyways, I did get to chat briefly with the soccer bloke after the lady from People magazine got reprimanded for asking an inappropriate question by said uptight guy.

My interview was pretty cut and dry - you can read the WHOPPING two questions I got to ask him here.

He seemed like a really nice guy. At one point in my 1.5 minute interview I took off my sunglasses so I can look him in the eye. I felt it was rude to talk to him while my eyes were covered. I wondered if he thought I was hitting on him.

Here’s some pics from the event…

And here is a ghetto ass video I took of the unveiling…

This is probably all old news to everyone, but eh…I needed something to post on here that took my mind off the looming lay-offs at work…

Wow…it’s only been four months and we have another round of lay-offs scheduled at work! As usual, I am shitting in my pants because I don’t know if I am going to have a steady paycheck come July 11 (that’s when they plan on cutting loose 29 employees).

This one came pretty fast. Last Friday, we got an e-mail from the head honcho saying that some of the management have been cut from the paper and their last day was that day! Can you believe that?

We lost our food editor and that’s all I know for now.

Argh. I hate being in lay-off limbo. This is terrible. I guess I need to start hookin’ again.

The reason I went to NY last week was because of my friend, Janet’s b-day.

On the last night, her roommate and our friend Erline wanted to fulfill her wish of having Jake Ryan sitting on a table with her along with a Carvel birthday cake a la Sixteen Candles circa 1984 (i.e. she wanted to be Sam Baker a.k.a. Molly Ringwald):

Instead, she got this…

Janet looks happy while I look like someone just violated me.

Yes you heard that right.

I know I should’ve blogged about this a while ago, but whatever.

When I was in New York last week - Brooklyn to be exact - I was in desperate need to satisfy my nicotine fix. Yes, I have been trying to quit. Yes, I know it’s a nasty habit. No, I haven’t even attempted to quit yet.

Anyway, I expected cigarettes to be at most $7 there (they are about $5 here in the Bay), but then when I went to a bodega to get pack, it was a whopping $9.

Fuck. That’s what I get for slowly killing myself.

Okay, so remember yesterday when I said I have had some sort of unintentional “thing” with guys named David lately? (scroll down to the bottom of this link to refresh your memory) Well you can add David Arquette to the list….

Yeah - I met him tonight at a screening of the new short film he directed, “The Butler’s in Love” based on a painting that he and his wife, Courtney Cox saw at Bix Restaurant in SF during their rehearsal dinner.

Good film - and is it me or do I look really creepily excited in this picture?

I recently watched…

Very delightful and fun…and dare I say, it was “cute?”

Ummm…better than the first attempt - I agree with Entertainment Weekly when they said that the new Hulk is too veiny. And, of course, I enjoyed Edward Norton as the new Hulk - I enjoy him in any movie (BITE THE CURB!). But…I hate to say this, but I am not feelin’ Liv Tyler in this. Believe me, I tried to enjoy her -really hard. I loved her in “Empire Records” and in “Lord of the Rings,” but in this (and “The Strangers”)…not so much.

It’s a good thing that I adored this cast, otherwise it would’ve been a lame movie.

C’mon now M. Night - you can do better than this. It wasn’t TERRIBLE - because there were moments when I did freak out. But it wasn’t his best. Nonetheless, the whole “green” appeal to this movie was smart on his part.

Okay - this was one of those, “we are all connected in some fucked up way” movies. It’s been done before, but it was decent. Again, it was one of those movies where the great cast made me like it.

I recently read…

It’s funny, I bought this book like five years ago and never read it. I found it buried in a pile of books when I went back to Texas a couple of weeks ago - it’s a fuckin’ good book. The movie is good too, but David Benioff is an exceptional writer - he is now going on my “Heroes” list.

Before you even think of talking back to your parents or treating them like shit…read this book. But it goes beyond that - it’s just so brilliantly brutal. I devoured this book in about four days. David Sheff’s struggle with his son’s addiction gave me insight of what a parent goes through with something as small as going to a sleepover at a friend’s house. Sure, I may not have been an “addict,” but I have had my share of less-than-desirable situations. I put my parents through hell…but this book gave me just a taste of what they went through when I was making choices I shouldn’t have. Sheff is also on my heroes list of writers…his son’s book, “Tweak” is next on my list.

See - I’m smart. I read. I just don’t write about fluffly fashion!

I am writing (or currently writing)…

My teleplay for that contest…FINGERS CROSSED!

Everything on my work blog (including a recent interview with David Beckham) and some short articles on the Bay Area Style page…

All of this reading and storytelling have had me brainstorming some ideas for a novel…

Wow. I just realized I have had a thing for Davids lately: Benioff, Sheff, Beckham…who’s next? David Archuleta?

I took an extra long weekend and went to New York for some non-Fashion Week related fun.

To get a little more cultured, I decided to go to the American Museum of Natural History and then the next day I went to The Met (a.k.a. The Metropolitan Museum of Art).

I felt so refined as I walked amidst fifth grade classes and tourists with fanny packs.

All was going well until I saw this at the Museum of Natural History:

Then I saw this at the Met…

Okay. I was laughing to myself when I was taking these pictures. I felt like a 5th grader when they split the class up into boys and girls and show them those “your body is changing” videos. God I am so mature.

P.S. What is the female version of the word “phallus?”

It’s been a while since I posted on this blog that is supposed to make me famous…so now I am going to post something.

So a couple of weeks ago I had three distinct moments of minor Z-list SF Bay Area stardom. OK, actually, it didn’t even define my stardom - because that doesn’t exist.

Here are my moments that boosted my micro-ego for an extremely short amount of time in my life:

1.) I was warming up my lunch of broccoli and salmon at the 50 year old microwave at our office, when this really nice Filipino lady approached me. She was one of those 40-something chatty Filipinas that dressed a little too young for their age…okay, she dresses really young. It was like she shopped at Forever 21 or in the junior section at a department store. She also had a gaudy purse that could or could not be a fake - BUT - she was SO nice. She reminded me of one of my “hip” aunts who constantly gives me money.

Anyways, while I was waiting for the industrial microwave to overheat and dry out my frozen food cuisine, she asked, “Pilipino ka ba?” I said yes and she got really excited - but then she got unexcited when I told her I don’t speak Tagalog, only understand it.

Then she said she reads my stuff all the time! My face brightened up! Finally another fan! That makes a total of three - I think. Nonetheless, she’s a fan that worked in admin upstairs! To make things better, she said “It’s so good to have a Filipino writer in the paper!”

I was all a twitter. I got a boner from the whole thing.

2.) I was walking to an event in San Francisco at this boutique called Carrots. I was wearing my blue A.P.C. cords, a purple DKNY button down, a black velvety H&M blazer and my Ferragamo loafers. For a little dandy flair I used this vintage silk white and blue patterned scarf as an ascot. Do you like how I bold faced all the brand names to illustrate my shallowness?

Anyways, as I was walking against the brisk wind amidst the 5 p.m. traffic, this gal rolled down her window and hollered at me, “I LOVE YOUR OUTFIT!” Sure, she seemed like one of those sorority girls that would get sloshed at a club and then stick her tongue down the token disco slut’s throat, but she complimented me! She is forever excused. I smiled. I had a little spring in my step after that. I felt like I was gliding down a rainbow.

3.) At the aforementioned event, I met my friends Cheryl and Erin. There was a photographer there - ya know, one of those photo peeps who are there to take high society pics that you find in those local glossy luxury mags. Those pics that take up one-quarter of the magazine. The pics of people who you don’t know. The ones who are all dressed up at some uptight event. The ones who you could care less about. The ones you see and constantly say, “who the fuck are these people and why are they important?” Well, I was in one of those pictures!

A photographer asked Cheryl, Erin and I to pose for a picture. He took a couple of shots and then he said, “Okay, just you Dino.”

I was like, “Are you fucking kidding me?”

I stood there awkwardly as he snapped photos of me. My mouth started hurting from smiling.

I felt like a star. A very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very minor star. Even so, I did manage to get a aroused just a little bit.

Thank God America’s Best Dance Crew is back. Now I can sit in front of the TV more than usual.

Yes it’s all back - J.C. Chasez and his surprisingly urban dandy outfits, Shane Sparks and his low-brim baseball caps, bling and knack for criticism, Mr. Mario “Chorus Line” Lopez and Lil Mama along with her arsenal of ponytail-through-the-top-rhinstone-encrusted baseball caps. And might I add, I have noticed that Lil Mama, in her critiques, says “I appreciate that,” as opposed to her template quote from last season, “I respect that.” My, how she has grown.

Last year, Jabbawockeez (my sister and my cousin vow to be co-presidents of their fan club along with every other girl in the world) took the prize and this year there is some stiff competition (that’s what she said).

I’m really enjoyin’ A.S.I.I.D. (And So It Is Done), not just because they have a deaf member (yes you heard that right), but because they turned that stage out - and I loved the color combo they picked for their outfits. Good story. Good dancing. Sounds like a good combo for longevity on the show.

Then there is another girl group called Sass times 7. Ummm. Okay. The whole cheerleading act is fun and cute - but I don’t see them lasting very long - especially with a group name like that.

Boogie Bots: I just like the name for the breakin’ crew, but I am feelin’ Super Cr3w a little bit more when it comes to tearin’ up the floor with six-step tricks. Even so, their talent is not up to par as of yet. They need to STEP IT UP!

As for Philly-based Phresh Select, I didn’t catch their performance, but the name reminds me of a Fresh-Mex fast food joint. Word says that they are kind of cocky.

I was actually impressed by the boys from suburbia, Xtreme Dance Force and the LA-based jazz-pop group Fanny Pack is this year’s BreakSk8, only because it’s giving us something different to look at other than hip-hop. It’s a gimmick that beat out one of my fave dance crews from California: Team Millenia. Man - I wish they stayed on the show.

Then there is Distorted X a majority girl group (with two guys) who were pretty decent - and okay, okay, I have to mention So Real because I am from Texas and I know of the crew from my days of college, but I am more familiar with the “first generation” of the crew. But I must give them a friendly nod for their growth.

Even so, I have to back San Francisco’s own Soul Supreme they threw down on that stage - and I loved their choice of letterman’s jackets for their costuming - it’s very throwback Michael Jackson meets Rydell High.

Hmmmm…can they take the top prize? I guess we’ll just see!

I can’t WAIT for this season to start! (June 19 - MARK YOUR CALENDARS!)

You can watch all of their live auditions and vote for who you want to go through to the next round at dancecrew.mtv.com.

And mind you - this is one of the only shows I watch on MTV since they decided to put on vomit-inducing shows like The Hills. Ugh. Just thinking about that show makes me have violently splattering diarrhea.